Conspiracy
At breakfast, Rick runs out of pancake syrup and gets his intern, Glootie, to give him some more. Glootie has a tattoo on his forehead that says “DON’T DEVELOP MY APP”. As Glootie persistently asks the family if anyone would like to develop his app, Rick dismisses him, and when Jerry asks why the message was tattooed on Glootie’s head, Rick specifically says it’s to keep Jerry from developing Glootie’s app. Finished with breakfast, Rick alludes to taking a detour to the bathroom. However, once he’s out of the room, Summer explains that Rick is a “shy pooper” and goes into detail about how shy he is, even telling the rest of the family that he has a special place to poop. Jerry smugly declares that he’s not a shy prick like Rick, to sarcastic congratulations.
After he’s done with his own toilet, Jerry wanders over to Glootie copying something. They get into a short conversation about the development of Glootie without really explaining what it is. Jerry immediately jumps in to agree to develop the Glootie app with minimal persuasion.
On a beautiful lush planet with beautiful exotic plants and landscapes, Rick lands his ship on a sparkling beach. Wading through the tall grass and inhaling air, he passes through a forest of dense tall trees before reaching a toilet seat on a short platform. As Rick enjoys the breathtaking view with a glittering light display similar to the aurora borealis in the night sky, a flowing sparkling creek, a gentle breeze and the distant calls of the wild, he poops in isolation.
When he’s done, he washes his hands under a small natural waterfall and spots a suspiciously broken tree branch a few feet away. Rick pulls out a tool to analyze which of the planet’s inhabitants could have broken it, but the results are unknown. Furious, Rick lets out a whale cry. In response, one of the alien beasts approaches and Rick twists one of its antlers, revealing it to be a robot of some sort. The creature trots to the tree and connects with it, opening an elevator in the tree. Deep underground, Rick has cutting edge technology. He uses a computer to analyze the matter, which is not from him, and discovers that it comes from a particular sandwich that was previously consumed by an unidentified intruder.
Back at the Smith residence, Jerry and Glootie pop champagne to celebrate the launch of their app just as Morty walks by the door. Morty stops and walks in, immediately realizing what Jerry has done. Morty asks in disbelief why Jerry thinks Rick told them not to develop Glootie’s app. When Jerry dismissively says it’s because Rick is a “disrupt-o-phobe”. Morty grabs him by the collar and tells him that it’s too much to hold on to something terrible to prevent something terrible from happening, which Rick was too lazy to explain. Glootie is happy to check in and let them know they have their first app users.
At the mall, Summer happily opens the new “Lovefinderrz” app on her phone, which has just matched her with Danny Publits, a 25-year-old who works at Jersey Mike’s and watches 25 Phish shows a year. Beth, who had lunch with her, disapproves, not least because of Danny’s age. When Danny runs up to them in disarray, he blatantly ignores Beth and he and Summer escape. Meanwhile, many other people also get notifications on their phones from Lovefinderrz and also start running to their new romantic matches. Outraged, Beth calls Jerry to let him know what’s going on, belittling Lovefinderrz’s misspelled name and informing him that he’ll be late.
Embarrassed, she tells Glootie to shut down the app. But Glootie says she can’t; he’s just an intern. Horrified and frustrated, Morty destroys their computer setup with a tennis racket. Unfortunately, that’s not how apps work, as Glootie states, and destroying their computer won’t immediately show up on the app. Morty shakes Glootie and tells him to take it off the server. Glootie tells Morty and Jerry that the servers are on his mothership. After some more shaking and trying to escape using the “Ominous Beep” application, he is forced to take them on board.
At the Best Frog Food Place in the Gorgon Quadrant, Rick bursts into a mob boss with fly creatures named Vermigurber surrounded by his frog minions. Rick wants to know about the sandwich, which is at first misinterpreted as double talk about drugs or guns. After Rick threatens the lives of Vermigurber’s 470,000 of 800,000 children and learns that Rick was really there about a literal sandwich, he tells Rick what he wants to know: who ordered the sandwich. Unbeknownst to Vermigurber, he tells Rick that the delivery robot that delivered him has run off to fight in the robot wars.”Vermigurber: “Hey apes, I hope it was worth making a whole swarm of enemies.
Rick: “That will be when I find the one who pooped in my toilet.”
Vermigurber: “Is it… code for something? Somebody find it. If it’s drug slang, I need to know.”
Back with Summer, who has just rented the keys to the motel, and Danny, they are interrupted by Beth. When Beth grabs Summer’s arm to stop her, Summer yells “assault!”, to which Beth retorts “statutory rape!” An exhausted-looking motel guest joins the commotion from his upstairs window to tell them that the people at the motel have their own problems and they can’t afford to interfere in theirs, so they have to deal with theirs themselves. Summer tells Beth that she can’t stop Summer from getting a hotel room, so Beth stubbornly says she’ll get a room next to theirs and listen to them with a glass against the wall.
Summer: “Fine. Enjoy.”
Beth: “I will.”
Morty and Jerry on the mothership tell the first person in the teleport room to download the app. After Glootie confirms that she is their hostage and that none of them have a gun, the other secretary tells them that she is an intern so she can’t do anything with the app either. Morty tells him to take them to someone who can do something or he’ll be spanked. After a while they agree and they are all escorted to meet the leader of the Monogatrons, a Glootie species.
The leader tells them that while the human race was still playing with fire, theirs had harnessed the power of working, committed relationships. Jerry and Morty again demand that he download the app or they’ll punch him. The leader looks around, wondering if there was anyone with a gun or other weapon, and Glootie reports that he is on his way. Jerry asks what an evil plan is, to which the leader returns with his question of whether an evil plan is necessary. The Smiths mumble awkwardly before the gun is finally brought in, and it turns out that this was indeed a bad plan. The app was baiting people with the promise of “love”. As a primitive pre-application species, humans are unaware that love is abundant, but not as abundant as water, which is what the leader of the Monogatrons wants from humans and their planet, and uses the fault-finding human love as a distraction.
As the leader explains his plan, Summer on Earth leaves Danny in the middle of the night when the app connects her to someone new, and various others nearby do the same, easily dumping their previous lovers to make their new “soulmate” match their app. with them.
After explaining the plan, the leader’s wife comes to plan a date. While she and her husband talk about how partners in a healthy relationship would do, Jerry and Morty fight off the interns and try to escape.
In the middle of the Midland Quasar robot wars battlefield, Rick impersonates a lieutenant by wearing a metal funnel with a QR code on the side as a hat. When Rick finds a delivery robot to ask who he delivered a bird protein club sandwich with no lettuce, he gets shot in the head. Rick rushes to grab three of the four pieces of the drone’s memory archive chip after it is killed in battle, killing several lizard soldiers standing inside it in the process. After meeting the fourth quarter, one of the lizard people mockingly swallows the last bit in front of Rick. Out of annoyance, Rick single-handedly disrupts the war and Robolution knocks over the Lizards.
While the messages are being delivered, in a quiet alien office, Rick delivers a sealed contamination box to a grave, soft-spoken official named Tony. Rick asks where he wants to die, to which Tony calmly asks Susan if conference room number three is available. At the office, Tony asks if he can look at a picture of his wife while Rick kills him. Tony soberly and gently explains that his wife is dead, that he’s a shy prick, and that’s why he used Rick’s nice toilet. Rick looks at him before teleporting to another dimension where Tony’s wife lived, bringing up that version of Tony to explain that he also used a really awesome toilet that day. Disgusted, Rick shoves the other Tony back into his dimension and tells Tony not to use his dead wife as an excuse for being a toilet thief. As Rick is about to leave, Tony wonders if Rick is going to kill him. Rick yells in disbelief, “Don’t tell me what to do!” before you set up a dung bomb on the conference table that sticks out its middle finger after stinking up the room.
Back in his hi-tech bunker, Rick vibrates when he gets a notification that Tony has returned to the bathroom. In disbelief, Rick transforms into a giant robot version of himself to confront Tony. The two get into an argument, with Tony fearlessly telling Giant Rick that pooping is an effort to control; a way to protect that one thing from a universe that takes what it wants. Rick stubbornly turns around, pulls down his pants, and sits on top of Tony in response.
Tony opens his eyes to the cloudy bathroom sky and is greeted by his wife. Both God and his wife encourage him to poop with them, but Tony grows increasingly dissatisfied and sad. It turns out that Tony is actually attached to a giant artificial sac filled with a red liquid. Maybe Tony subconsciously realizes that it’s not really heaven, so his body turns to suffocate through the breathing tubes. Before he can die, Rick comes to cut him down.
“Tony: “Where are we? What is it?”
Rick: “That’s it. Get out.”
Tony: “You can make a perfectly realized, toilet-filled simulation of heaven, but you can’t share a toilet?”
Infuriated, Rick explains that the chemical is called Globaflyn, which connects the part of the brain you want with the part you have. Tony looks around at all the different people trapped in the sacks, a kind of prison that Rick built where they could live out their wildest dreams while Rick was left out of them. Tony hits the nail on the head by realizing that these are the people Rick refuses to kill and refuses to let into his life. Rick opens the portal and tells him that this is Tony’s last chance since he rejected the heaven that Rick offered. Amused, Tony tells Rick he’ll meet him and offers him friendship, though Rick, in a bad mood, pretends otherwise.
In the ventilation shaft, Morty and Jerry come up with a plan to destroy the mothership and escape. Irritated and tired, Morty wearily agrees. Jerry insists on high-fiving despite Morty’s bad humor and sharp remarks about how they were in the mess because of Jerry, but eventually relents. Unfortunately, the grate collapses below them and they both land in the middle of an army of soldiers.
Back with the toilet, Rick rigs it up and connects it to a complicated looking and ominous looking system.
Confusion still reigns on Earth with pairs constantly joining and disconnecting. Summer paraglides into the church to crash the wedding of her newest beau, Jeff. Just as Jeff asks the priest to take them instead of the bride, a man on a motorcycle bursts in to take Jeff away. The two drive off just as another man riding a horse bursts through the window for the bride. Another wall collapse as a construction worker rides a crane to pick up the priest. Then a woman in a hot air balloon flew through the ceiling at Summer. Beth, determined to follow Summer, crashes into the backyard with her paraglider. The farmer inside yells at her in shock, asking what she’s doing. Beth briefly replies that she is a parent.
Farmer: “I didn’t do it that way.”
Beth: “Yeah, where’s your daughter?”
Farmer: “Ah, you’re right… She joined ISIS.”
Locked in, Morty and Jerry are freed by Glootie after Jerry manages to bond with him. Glootie suggests downloading a dating app before making a quirky exit.
“Morty: “Dad, I want to say something. I started today disgusted and embarrassed to be your son and later I thought we were going to die because you’re a loser.”
Jerry: “…There’s no more, is there?”
Morty: “No. Now stop fucking and let’s go.”
Rick enters Tony’s office building and asks the tearful receptionist if he’s been there since he brought him vegan fiber chili and a box of sugar-free chocolate and to tell him the bathroom is his. He sadly informs Rick that Tony died after quitting his job, living life to the fullest before crashing into a tree while space skiing from Mount Space Everest.
Summer, who was on the plane with the last woman, gets another ping on her phone to let her know she has a new soul mate and leaves to meet him. After greeting him, she gets into another fight with Beth, who is determined to be her mother. The two get into a dramatic physical fight on the airport tarmac. When Summer’s phone rings again, she desperately picks it up after Beth drops it for a moment. However, this time the app is covered with an ad block. Tired of it, Summer deletes the app and many others do the same with the app. Summer and Beth listlessly head home.
The leader of the Monogatron becomes upset over the loss of Earth, and as his wife tries to comfort him, they end up arguing about the importance of water to their relationship.
At home, Jerry and Beth talk about Beth using the app, but Beth assures him that she didn’t. The two embrace and Beth hides the fact that she was involved with Ted Danson before deleting the app.
At Tony’s funeral, Rick gives Tony’s father $8 billion in local currency, a kit to clone a new son even though he wouldn’t have the same brain as Tony, and tries to comfort his father by explaining that in one of the infinite universes Rick explored, there was a version of Tony that was absolutely evil because he was fulfilled. Father puts a sympathetic hand on Rick’s chest and says intuitively that it was hard to lose a friend. Rick suddenly curses him and denies being Rick’s friend.
Back in the bathroom, Rick pees over the edge of the cliff instead of using the toilet. He drunkenly stumbles over to her before sitting down. As two intimidating giant weapon-like mechs rise from the ground and aim at him, they become speakers, repeatedly taunting Rick’s voice as numerous holograms of him appear, cheering and clapping. As Rick sits on the toilet with the main hologram still taunting him, the crown that was in the toilet tank is placed on Rick’s head and it starts to rain. Rick’s situation has a similar feel to what happens at the end of “Auto Erotic Assimilation” in Season 2, Episode 3.
“Here he is. Here’s our guy. Congratulations, Tony. Have fun with your stupid toilet that you can now use all by yourself. Enjoy using it all by yourself while you sit there and think about how no one wants to be around you and how you’ve ruined it yourself because you’re a huge piece of shit. Look at you sitting there, king of shit on your throne of loneliness. Enjoy this toilet with thousands of me screaming every time you shit. All praise his majesty, that sa-a -dddest piece of trash in the entire universe. Long live big, bad, doo-doo daddy. Long live his reign for 1,000 years.”
Hologram of Rick
In the end credits, Jerry licks the Globaflyn off the fridge and sees himself standing in for “Mountain Sweat” with a water cooler and is thanked and praised by the woman. When Jerry comes back to the present, he starts desperately licking the chemical.
